Tuesday, December 22, 2009

David Goldman Wins His 5 Year Custody Battle


Yay.

David Goldman finally won his 5 year battle to bring his son home from Brazil.

That's a good thing, right?

BACKGROUND: The following is the first paragraph from David Goldman's own website:

"I married Bruna Bianchi Carneiro Ribeiro in Eatontown, New Jersey, USA, on December 17, 1999. We had a son, Sean Goldman, born in Red Bank, NJ on May 25, 2000. On June 16, 2004, I drove Bruna, Sean and Bruna's parents to Newark Airport for a planned 2-week vacation to her parent's home in Brazil. Bruna arrived in Brazil and called me that day to tell me our marriage was over, she and Sean were not returning to the US, and if I ever wanted contact with my son again, I would have to sign custody over to her. I have never signed any papers granting Bruna custody of our son, Sean."

RED FLAG! This tells me that Sean's mother, David's wife, had a premeditated plan to take her son and run away from David. The very first thing she did when she arrived in Brazil was to call him and tell him it's over, she's keeping her son, and his only option was to sign over custody.

There is something going on here. Sometime between December, 1999 and June, 2004, his wife decided she needed to take her son and runaway.

More from his web site:

"Although Bruna and I were still legally married in the United States, Bruna obtained a divorce in the eyes of Brazil (without my presence or knowledge). It is my understanding that Bruna became pregnant and remarried in Brazil...On August 22, 2008, Bruna tragically passed away during childbirth."


Thus began an epic 5 year, intercontinental custody battle that got played out on morning TV shows with David Goldman playing the victim of a vast latin-american conspiracy to keep him away from his son.

Today, the Brazilian Supreme Court ruled in David Goldman's favor. He gets to bring his son home to America. It's a Hallmark card. It's an Oxygen network mini-series. A wronged but loving father fights for his son and wins.

We're all verklempt!

But let's take a step back and look at this with some objectivity. I've blogged about this before.

Bruna, David's wife and Sean's mother, apparently felt like she needed to take her son and run away to the protection of her family in Brazil.

Why? We don't know. But if you felt like you needed to take your son and run away to your home country to be surrounded by your family and separated from your ex by two continents and many countries, don't you think you would have a good reason?

When Bruna took Sean to Brazil, Sean was only 3 years old.

Question: How much of your life from birth to 3 years old do you remember?

Answer: NONE!

Sean is now 9 years old! All he remembers is growing up in Brazil.

All of the people he has formed emotional attachments to are in Brazil. The only family he knows, is in Brazil.

He has gone to Kindergarten, 1st grade, 2nd grade, 3rd grade, 4th grade in Brazil. Every friendship he has ever formed is in Brazil.

If David Goldman REALLY had the best interest of his son at heart, he would have spent the past 5 years working on reaching some sort of accommodation with Sean's Brazilian family that would allow him to be a part of Sean's life.

But no. For whatever selfish reasons are motivating him, David Goldman has insisted on yanking his son Sean from the only life his son has ever known, and pulling him in to a foreign environment where he has no friends, no family and no cultural affiliation.

I'm a parent.

As a parent, it is my duty to put the welfare of my child above any desires, agendas or priorities I may have for my own life.

I don't think David Goldman is doing this.

I think that for 5 years he has been OBSESSED with getting his son back at all costs. I don't know what his motivation was. Revenge against his ex for leaving him and marrying someone else, revenge against her family for honoring her wishes, I have no idea.

But I don't think he ever gave any consideration to the idea that uprooting his son from the only life that he has ever known might be detrimental to his son.

I have never understood this sort of vindictive, territorial, possessive custody battle.

Parental needs and egos should ALWAYS fall way behind the best interests of the children.

In the Goldman case, the best interests of Sean Goldman would appear to be to leave him in the only environment he has ever known, with the only family he has ever bonded with, and the only friends he has ever made.

I think David Goldman is a selfish, vindictive douche who is using his son as an emotional weapon against he ex-wife's family.

If he truly cared about his son, he wouldn't be spending so much time and energy to fuck up his son's life.

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